Part of being an adult is knowing how your parents behaved/responded/acted to others and to life when you were a child and deciding what does and does not apply to you now. Let go of the restraints of “well this is how we did it growing up”. End the blame game of “it’s my mom’s fault because she was absent”. Hiding behind your parents’ behaviors as a crutch for your own? Using your parents’ deficiencies as an explanation for your own? Reverts you back to a child. Enough already. You’re the adult now. Pick out what works for you and what doesn’t. Walk away from old, harmful patterns just as you walked out of your parent’s door when you moved out. The good stuff that you want to keep? Take that with you and leave the rest behind, just as you packed up your favorite childhood mementos and left the unwanted stuff behind. It’s the same thing with behaviors. You’re the adult now. You get to think for yourself. You get to decide for yourself. You get to be you without the constraints of anyone else. You’re free. You choose. Happy adulting.